Toy Soldiers (bp coyle)

‘Are you happy?’

‘Of course.’

‘I knew you wanted it to be a boy.’

‘All that matters is that it’s healthy.’

‘Now you’ll have someone to watch football with.’

‘I guess. I hadn’t thought that far ahead.’

‘You can teach him to play golf.’

‘I could teach a girl to play golf you know. And if we ever have a girl she might just like football.’


‘Toy soldiers!’


‘I used to love toy soldiers when I was small. I had thousands of them. They were tiny, I’d spend hours setting them up for battle.’

‘No toy soldiers!’

‘What? Why not?’

‘No toy soldiers, no toy guns Nothing that glorifies war or death. I don’t want my son growing up to become a soldier or a gangster or someone who thinks killing is fun.’

‘That’s crazy. It never did me any harm.’

‘We should get him a doll.’

‘A doll? You mean like Action Man?’

‘I was thinking more like Barbie.’


‘I so loved my Barbie Dream House.’

‘I bet.’

‘Or maybe one of those baby dolls that pee and poop.’


‘Oh I’m kidding. We’ll get him whatever he wants.’


‘But no toy soldiers!’